LOVE IN A TIME OF CORONAVIRUS
“He was still too young to know that the heart’s memory eliminates the bad and magnifies the good, and that thanks to this artifice we manage to endure the burden of the past.” Gabriel Garcia Marquez
We are living in strange times. Coronavirus is a world-wide disease that is leaving people all over the world sometimes deathly ill, without work, without pay, and wondering what you are going to do in your house all day (hey that rhymes!).
Small businesses everywhere have been hit hard by the shut downs and quarantines. As a dentist, we have been asked to close to conserve PPE (personal protective equipment aka masks, gowns etc) and to only see emergency patients until June 15th – an order by the Oregon governor. The economical impact of not working for 2.5 months for everyone in the dental field is staggering and potentially devastating.
So what am I going to do with potentially 2.5 months of free time, no income, and no where to go?
I am the type of person who doesn’t do very well with lots of free time. I thrive on being busy. So after 10 days of not going anywhere except the hardware store (I used Instacart to order groceries), I have come up with a daily routine that’s helped me enjoy the days, feel like I’m not just being a lazy slob, and helped make memories that will cause me to look back on this time with some fondness and not regret.
So here’s what’s helped me not go crazy over these last few days. I also feel compelled to note that since I don’t have kids, I recognize that these are things that perhaps only a single person or a person with no kids can do, since I don’t also have to entertain and teach little ones.
I change out of my PJs. Day 1 of quarantine I stayed in my pjs until, well, bedtime. What I’ve learned since then is that getting ready for the day – even if it’s just washing my face, brushing my hair and putting on yoga pants (because let’s be real – I’m not sitting at home all day wearing jeans!), really helps put me in a mindset of being ready for the day.
While tempting to stay in my bathrobe and eat all day, it helps me to be more productive if I put on ‘real clothes.’
I do something creative. Whether it’s write, bake/cook, learn a dance, make a video, I pick something that tickles my creative side and is fun to do. Is it silly, vain and maybe totally stupid to spend 1.5 hours getting all dressed up to make a 5 second Tik Tok video? Yes, it is. But it brings me joy and it’s important for me to have moments of the kind of joy that’s sparked by doing something creative. And I definitely have the free time to do it now, so why the heck not?
I had no where to go, but it was fun to get dressed up and make a video.
I pick one or two household chores to do. This can be actual cleaning or organizing. I HATE organizing things so this is something I can only make myself do every few days, but in the in-between, I can deep clean the bathroom, vacuum or catch up on laundry.
I do something related to my profession. Just because I can’t physically do dentistry doesn’t mean I can’t keep learning about it. I have stacks and stacks of dental journals lying around that I never read … until now. Also there are a lot of free CE dental classes right now that you can do online like right here
Exercising. It normally involves taking my dogs (yes I have dogs- plural- now, but that’s for another blog post) on long walks but when it’s raining, sometimes it’s learning a new dance, or trying an at-home workout.
Daily “walks” with the dogs
I try to talk to someone I love every day. Whether it’s through FaceTime or Zoomchat, it is incredibly helpful to see someone as opposed to just talk to them via phone or text.
Family time on Zoomchat.
It’s important to remind myself that I’m not trying to “win” this quarantine. The above listed are things that I try to do every day but I might only do 5 out of 6. It’s not about how fit (or unfit) I get, how many house projects I finish or how many boring dental journals I read. What I should be focusing on every day are these two questions: How can I be loving to myself every day? and How can I let someone else know that they are loved?
When I look back at this time, I want it to be a time seeped in love. I want to look back and think, “Wow, there were some really hard moments, but look at all the good that came too.” I want to look back and see that my brand-new husband and I really grew in our love and friendship (yep – have a husband now too- but that’s for another blog post). I want to feel like I grew closer to my friends in spirit even if physically we were separated. I’ll admit, I’m still trying to figure out what that looks like. I’m also trying to figure out how I can love and support my community.
What are you doing during this time? What is helping you? What have you been surprised to find out about yourself?